Finally! One thing that has always bothered me about bugs is how dirty they are... all that crawling out of the ground, and scurrying under things. Well, look no more! Your dreams have been answered by your friends at Prestone. Bug Wash. Last night I collected every bug in my house and bathed them one by one. A little sudsy bubble bath, a few candles lit for atmosphere, some mood music... and VOILA! So, a round of applause to Prestone for coming up with bubble bath for bugs. Damn. There's a marketing niche for everything.

New vs. Old

Just when you were tired of Old Boston Globs.....

I plan on making a big statement when I finally go out. I'm just saying because this is the coolest set of headstones I've ever seen. From the right there are two identical stones, then there's a tiny offset regular headstone for a baby, followed by the giant family stone. This must have been way weird in 1901.

Dress to Impress

Now, I'm not saying that I don't sometimes venture out in less than GLAMOUR attire. I am saying that one needs to be careful and plan for the unexpected. For instance, when posing for your mugshot, after allegations of child neglect, I think you may want to consider something other than your "I HEART WEED" shirt.

Cheap Ass Soda

A little trip to my local Stop and Shop revealed some very bad choices in the carbonated beverage aisle. Along with all the high fructose corn syrup and sodium benzoate laden brightly colored fizzy water were some very poorly marketed 2 liter disasters. Who is buying this stuff?

First... Dr. Bob. Bob. Really. Well, my first thought is that I'm glad Bob followed through with his doctorate. Really impressive Bob. But, why go to all that trouble securing a degree to just throw it all away in a carbonated heap? You've really let your Mom down, Bob.

Second... QUIST. It strikes me as a compound word, but I am baffled by it's monosyllabic nature. Quist is comprised of...

• QUiz
• QUirky
• QUick
• QUench
• QUart
• QUeen
• QUestion

And the IST.... hmmmm. (Insert long pause for pondering here).... That's it! Quist = Quirky Chemist! Some quirky chemist whipped up this laboratory delight and left it here for us to enjoy. Go on, you drink it first!